Head to head

Piña Colada vs. Suffering Bastard

Piña Colada and Suffering Bastard side by side: what changes in the recipe, the balance, the strength and the calories.

The difference, by the numbers

They have no ingredient in common: the Piña Colada has white rum, cream of coconut and pineapple juice, the Suffering Bastard Cognac, gin, lime juice, Angostura bitters and ginger beer. In parts, a Piña Colada is 1 rum, ½ coconut and 1 pineapple; a Suffering Bastard is 1 brandy, 1 gin, ½ lime and 3 ginger beer. By volume, the Piña Colada is 62% mixer and juice and 38% spirit; the Suffering Bastard is 55% mixer and juice, 36% spirit and 9% citrus. Different bottles, similar balance: that makes them close cousins on the ratio map.

The Suffering Bastard is the stronger drink in the glass (11.0% ABV against 9.6%) and holds more alcohol (1.39 standard drinks against 1.13). The Piña Colada has more calories (about 267 against 176) and more sugar (23.9 g against 9.3 g). The Piña Colada is blended and served in a hurricane glass; the Suffering Bastard is shaken and served in a highball.

On the ratio map

SpiritVermouthCitrusMixerSyrupLiqueurPiña ColadaSuffering Bastard

Each drink sits nearer the corners it has more of: spirit, vermouth and bitter, citrus, mixer, syrup or liqueur. The gray dots are the other classics. Explore the full ratio map.

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